男生有了女朋友后的惨状 The things happened after having a girlfriend

没认识你之前我拿奖学金，认识你之后我差点补考。
Before i know u i got flying colours, after i know u i got a low low mark

一个苹果，都给你吃。两个苹果，我把大的给你吃。
one apple i give u eat, two apple i give u the big one

同吃一条鱼，我让你吃鱼肉，我自己吃鱼头。
eat the same fish ,i give u meat ,u give me bone

出去玩都是我花钱，回来我只能吃萝卜
go to play all use my money, come back i can only eat carrot

认识你之前我没交过女朋友。认识我之前你交了两个男朋友。
before i know u i didn't have any girlfriends, but before u know me uhave many boyfriends

你生气时，我让你当出气筒。我生气时，我把自己当出气筒。
if u angry u mad at me. when i am angry i cannot mad at u

你想吻我的时候就可以吻我。我想吻你的时候还要经过你同意。
u can kiss me any time ,but i must ask u before kiss u

你经常打我，我从来没有打过。
u always hit me, but i never hit u

有一次你问我如果你爱上别的男人了我会怎样，我说我要杀了那个男的。我又问你如果我爱上了别的女人了你会怎样，你说你要阉了我。
u ask me if u love other boy what will i do, i say kill the boy. i ask u what will u do if i love other girl, u say u will kill me

我买了200块的衣服给你，骗你才50块。你买了30块的手表给我，骗我要300块。
i buy a shirt cost 200,i say it is on ly 50.u buy a watch cost 30 , but u say it cost 300

我把你的耳机用坏了，我买新的赔你。你把我的自行车丢了，连句对不起也没说。
i will buy a new one for u if i broke your things. but if u broke my things u say nothings even sorry

你生病一次，我要瘦两斤。我生病一次，你反而胖两斤（你来寝室陪我，吃光了我所有的零食。）
when u sick, i become thinner .when i am sick ,u become fatter.(u eat all the things beside my bed)

我没嫌你矮，你却嫌我高。
i don't say u short, but u say me too tall

你来我家，我睡沙发。我去你家，还是我睡沙发。
u come to my house ,i sleep on sofa.i go to your house, also i who sleep on sofa

那次去看露天演唱会，你骑在我头上看得津津有味，我被你压在下面在人群中流泪。
we go to watch a concert, u ride on me and watch happily , but i cry sadly under u